A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies.....!

It's been a long time when time when I was looking for a book by Manto - Saadat Hasan Manto. I had read about him through my browses on poets from Pakistan and his name used to pop-up here and there and when I read about him and his nature of calling a spade a spade, my curiosity grew.

Whenever as a family we go into book store (which these days are diminishing due to all these online shopping), I look for books by Manto or for Manto and no luck! It was last year when we went to India for a family wedding and happen to go around in Bangalore where we were actually looking to hangout at the old Bangalore side which I love it even today as it reminds me of the days when I went to Bangalore in 90s and it makes you feel you're back in those days where everything has its own pace and there is a peace. No one is racing, we went to Blue Frog and spent some good time eating food, drinks and music...it was heaven.

After that we wandered around and saw this book stall and we just got lost inside. My husband as he was collecting many books, I was looking for two books... one by Manto and the other by Nathuram Godse! 
Luckily found both and I am glad that I was able to finish this book as I started reading Manto only after coming back to San Francisco. In between I saw the move on Manto as that got released as well in 2018. The movie I felt good as I had completed 80% of the book and hence the stories were reminding me of how it was written and how those were shown in the movie..! 
Now comes to the actual book, yes as I was reading the book from the beginning each story gave me the insight about Manto and his keen observations to smallest things - it could be the wind but how the wind was blowing the curtain or the hair of the girl in what direction and how - thats how detail he is in his description which takes a reader to experience as if its happening to the reader!

"The face is the mirror of the mind, and eyes without speaking confess the secrets of the heart" 

I was very impressed with his writing style and as I was reaching each story made me think about Manto. How detail he is? How much he thinks of women and writes about them everywhere it was about Manto in my mind. His language and vocabulary, I was all high with Manto until I started feeling every story is about prostitutes. He used to write for movies but still his story is all about them and how rich people enjoy and what not. At one point to be frank I felt Manto has nothing else to write about other than women who are prostitutes.

"There are two ways of spreading light: to be the candle or the mirror that reflects it" ~ Edith Wharton

But as you read next stories at the end, you realize whether its rich or poor people, women and her status in this society is what he is trying to show - a mirror!
This book actually not only made me curious through out but it also made me to think after I finished the book. I did think about those women from Manto's stories and also those men and I wondered life at that time and I compared to today and I felt nothing has changed. May be the standard and living styles might have changed based on the generation but ultimately society looks at women as an object, nothing has changed even though time has!!!

I also realized one thing that a point where I felt angry with Manto that he is only writing about prostitutes is also a skill of Manto to bring that anger in me for the women's sake and I give that credit to Manto. I wish there were more like Manto.

A good read and if you have ever lived near Bombay and Pune and have been close to Indian film industry then definitely it will touch your memories in a way to give that nostalgic kick to you.

I give 5/5 for this book and I want to read more of his books!

"...and it is also possible, that Saadat Hasan dies, but Manto remains alive." ~ Saadat Hasan Manto


~ Dawn

And though she may be broken, she is not defeated. She will rise unfettered, unbeaten, unimpeded..!

Heard a lot about #MeToo movement in America and around the world. People came up courageously to share what happened with them and pointing the culprit irrespective of their position in the world. 
Everyone said, lets hear it and lets investigate it and then punish the culprit. Nothing wrong in that statement.
I feel everyone who have gone through this sexual abuse irrespective of gender, should be heard. Because it is indeed tough and ruthless to a point where they are ready to share about their traumatic life with the world which is like going back and re-living that moment and that is very hard on themselves. For someone to come and share that with the world really needs courage. One must listen to them.

"A stare, a proximity, a smile, a touch - oddly familiar. He knows you wouldn't speak, he knows you don't understand enough to speak; me, too!" ~ Nipunya Panda

I feel this era is of awakening for many and I like it when I see people across the world irrespective of which industry they belong, they are coming out and sharing it and pointing the culprit by calling their name and sharing specific incidents, so the world know whats going around behind the big name and fame. This also helps others to be cautious and aware if they are in similar situation. This also many times helps the person whether they are experiencing it as many of them don't know what is considered as 'sexual abuse'. 

No one has any rights to abuse anyone, irrespective of what relationship they have with the individuals.

Last year the awakening happened in India too when Tanushree Dutta brought Nana Patekar's name under the #MeToo movement and how everyone supported her and encouraged women to speak up. In fact there's a committee also they created to protect women's rights in film industry where thorough investigations will be done on the accused until then they will be banned from the industry etc. I think this is a positive moment and that is what need to happen, we must encourage people to speak up and not suffer in dark.

"There's going to be a violent awakening we don't want. The question is, can we wake up?" ~ Anna Deavere Smith

I know Indian film industry is such that many idolize the actors as their god and so, it is difficult for some to even think of such allegations that is made because they see these people through the characters that they create, or they act and hence in their mind, its a lie! 
But then who are we to decide that? We were not there while the survivor was actually experiencing the torture or abuse and hence the fair judgement would be to listen to the survivor and do an investigation on the accused that has been called out.

Recent allegation on Rajkumar Hirani by one of his assistant director came up and what a twist in the game. Everyone speaking about how can he be? He is so good, innocent, too good to do anything wrong and he has no flaws and what not. 

I mean, I can imagine he did some great work in the film industry by brining great movies but that doesn't give a certificate for his character. 
More over, he can be so good that he may even know how people will trust him and not the survivor!!!
A person's character cannot be always judged only by his work.

I would have had more respect for the Indian film industry folks- who are supporting Rajkumar Hirani, if they would have said- let the formal investigation take place as things can happen to anyone. 

Not every talented person is a saint and I agree not every talented person is a criminal mind either. But it would have been better if this was left to the necessary officials to take care of in the right manner than giving character certificate to Rajkumar Hirani. 

"He scrolled through the social media, his fingers lingering on the keyboard, "me too" *pause* Delete Delete Delete. The fear of his #MeToo being judged differently from the others stifled yet another cry for help." ~ Srijan

My take on this, even though I don't know this person personally other than watching his movies, he should cooperate with the investigation and then let the result prove whether he is innocent or not.
Entire film industry is kind of stuck on his fame since he is a big shot in the industry, everyone is trying to save their future by being good in his book, I guess!

By defending him people are blocking the avenues of investigation.

"There's more to our species than we see in the mirror."

~ Dawn

There is always some madness in love ...!

Love is a very beautiful word with a beautiful meaning, isn't it?

Whether the love is for your beloved, your parents, siblings, friends, animals, your children and so many more they differ in the sense the expression of each type of love can differ.

I remember when my daughter long back went for her science camp for 3 days and as usual I told her to enjoy this time. But she says I cried when she came back...! Well, even today she teases me for that and I make joke out of it that actually I cried because you came back!!!

"The moment we cry in a film is not when things are sad but when they turn out to be more beautiful than we expected them to be" ~ Alain de Botton

All that is fun and now after many years my son went for his science camp for 3 days. I have not let him go alone anywhere until this time. We never encouraged sleepover for our kids as parents. It's not that we don't understand that or know that kids enjoy but thinking of other issues we always avoided. Kids have done sleepover with friends where we as parents are also present there.

Hence, when my son was going for his science camp I had all the typical motherly worries, will he be able to find things out there, will he be able to manage himself etc..! But then I said well he has to manage no matter what because I can't go and help so why worry and get stressed!

"In order to move on, you must understand why you felt what you did and why you no longer need to feel it" ~ Mitch Albom

Though at home everyone missed him, we as parents and his sister but it was only our dog Reyna who actually expressed it by holding on to his clothes and sleeping on them.

He had left on Tuesday and today he came back. Me and my husband were waiting for the time and also the school notification about their arrival so we can go and pick him up.
The wait was done after couple of my meetings and then when I got the text message from my son's school, we both went to receive him.

I was really not sure how my reaction would be because I was normal and eager to see him and hear all his stories. The moment I saw my son's face in the middle of his other schoolmates, tears filled in... is this love? The moment he came to me and I hugged him I started crying more.

When they are far you miss them because you love them but when they are with you then? Then also it's an expression of love through tears conveying that, I missed you!

"There is nothing as powerful as mother's love, and nothing as healing as a child's soul"

~ Dawn

Every new beginning comes from some other beginning's end. ... !

I want to wish everyone a very happy new year 2019!

This is my first post in this year and I hope I can be more active this year as last year I changed to a new job and it needed more of my attention from process implementation and leading for team to adapt it. Hoping this year things will much aligned so I can spend time in writing and doing my exercise.

As the year was ending, things seemed like working for me as I thought so... with related to work, colleagues and at family front. New job didn't make me stressed in fact I enjoyed the way I could give my sincere time to the job that I chose after 6 years of comfortableness. It gave me a change of experience with work, new learning, new beginning and meeting different people from different domain. I am enjoying this change, one should always be a student only then we will be open to learn and accept that we don't know everything and even if we know something based on our learning and experience, it should only bring humbleness.

"You may have a fresh start any moment you choose, for this thing that we call a 'failure' is not the falling down, but the staying down." ~ Mary Pickford

One thing is clear that for new beginnings you don't have to wait for new year, you can make new beginnings anytime and its all up to you and your willingness. If there's a will there is a way- and I do believe in this quote.
Since my new beginning started last year...by the time Christmas holidays came up I was totally exhausted and this break was much needed. Visiting Vegas was more or less a relaxation as there was no set agenda as I have been making frequent trips to Vegas previously and this was after a five years gap. 

"Food is the ingredient that binds us together." 

Santa Barbara was something I was looking forward with some more relaxation and more time with nature. Exploring different restaurants was one of the key activity, and so did visited different cuisines such as Indian restaurants Tamira and Bibi Ji - I won't say they are Indian restaurant but it is more or less a fusion for West. There was another place which I found it cool called Public Market, initially we thought its a grocery shopping place but we were looking for Empty bowl gourmet noodle bar and it took us to this Public Market place which has many different cuisines serving food and I felt that was the best place where all kinds of people came together to eat different food under one roof - I loved the food and the concept of this place, something worth visiting at least for once.
I am a foodie and hence this was an amazing journey to explore some of those things.
New Year is here and frankly speaking I have no new plans and resolutions because I don't believe in those. If you need to make a change you don't have to wait for the year to start, it can be done anytime and that You can decide!
For me, this new year is more to be cozy and be home and I blame it all on the weather and the holiday times... where it spoiled my routines with late nights and late waking up and breaking all rules...! I know I will roll-up my sleeves but will wait until next week.. ;)

Until then I wish everyone a good day, month, and year with new hope, aspirations, love and peace!

"Live, Love, Eat"

~ Dawn