We
talk about nature, water, land, fresh air, confidence and freedom but
everything comes with a price.
I
remember my time when I moved to Canada and was renting one of basement
apartment where I was to pay for my stay and food.
One
would imagine that if you pay you have no other obligation but that’s not how
it was. I used to respect and treat the owner and his wife as my parents. I did
everything in that house as if it’s my responsibility.
This
nature of mine gave me a tough time to deal with my day to day things. When I
was looking for a job, I was told to help with them in Jesus work. The owner
was a priest who would make me translate his stories and poems in other Indian
languages so that it can reach to those many people and that many people he
will be able to convert them into Pentecostal Christians.
Initially,
the way it was put on me as a task I thought I can ask them if my rent can be
waived but then I was told I shouldn’t expect something like this when I am
doing god’s work.
I
saw that there was another room in the basement that was rented by another girl
who came from Sri Lanka and we both didn’t take much time to become friends. It
was her Yamuna who took me out in downtown and made me apply for jobs. Since
the say I got the job the owner and his wife started telling me to stay away
from Yamuna. It reached to a level where Yamuna moved out to some other place
and I felt very lonely.
I
was forced to go to church with them every Sunday and start praying every day
in their house morning and evening.
Even
though I was paying my rent and staying in that house. The couple made me do
all their household chores such as help them washing dishes, cutting vegetables
etc. I always took as helping them but it took too much stress when they
started making me do things such as grate a whole coconut, cut the vegetables
in different suggested sizes and pack them in zip-lock bags and put it in
freezer during my day off.
Those
days finishing my work at night and coming from downtown to home used to be
almost mid-night and hence after a tiring day I went to bed at 1 am that too
with a bad headache. At 4 am my door is banged asking me to wake up because we
need to get up and pray for their son who is leaving for Malaysia for work. I
had taken some medicine hence I couldn’t wake up and when I did wake up it was
7 am in the morning and the priest got so mad at me that he started scolding me
for not being responsible and being part of the prayer. Even though I
apologized for not joining the prayer he kept on repeating and making me feel
guilty as if I did something wrong by not attending the prayer in the early
morning for his son.
I
really started feeling what am I doing. Why I have to be so obligated when
their own kids don’t listen to them. As a human and as an agnostic person I did
what I did but suffering and injustice is something that I am not taught to
tolerate.
As
they say everything has a limit. It was my time when I decided to move on and
took an apartment to live by my own. Yes, in those days in a new place, new
country it was fear in my mind. I was more scared because I was alone and being
a woman I was scared of everyone around. It’s this fear that always kept me way
from enjoying the freedom. Slowly, I moved from one job to the other and
actually started living and organizing my life.
The
freedom to live, the freedom to get to live by yourself and not be answerable
to anything is something a relief which I only realized after what I went
through.
Never
suppress anyone even if you are in a position to because once a person starts
disliking this behavior they want to go far from you. Love people and let
people love you. Freedom should not be by losing anyone.
"It is easy to take liberty for granted, when you have never had it taken from
you" :)
~ Dawn
