Lessons We Never Learned

 

In school—

we read about wars.

Not games…

not victories…

but blood.

Loss.

Silence

after the screams.

They called it… history.

And our teacher said—

“Learn from it…

so it never happens again.”

But tell me—

If we learned…

then why

is it happening again?

India. Pakistan.

America. Iraq.

Israel. Palestine.

And now—

Russia. Ukraine.

America. Iran.

Different names…

same graves.

So where are they?

The ones who taught us?

The ones who were supposed to learn?

Why is no one—

pulling them by the collar

and saying—

THIS.

IS.

WRONG.

This is not strategy.

This is not politics.

This—

is humanity

bleeding.

Tell me…

why don’t we fight poverty instead?

Why don’t we build homes

instead of graves?

Why don’t we give people

a chance to live—

not just survive?

What have we become?

We know what’s right.

We know what’s wrong.

And still—

we watch.

Wars begin.

Lives end.

And we scroll.

Our ears?

Numb.

Our eyes?

Tired.

No explosion…

no scream…

shocks us anymore.

Are we still human?

Or are we monsters—

hiding behind comfort?

Or worse…

walking corpses?

Why does no one

hold them accountable?

Take them—

not to power,

but to truth.

Make them sit.

Make them listen.

Make them feel—

every loss they signed away.

Because maybe—just maybe—

One day…

In this broken, war-torn world…

Someone will wake up…

And choose peace.

And maybe then—

We will finally learn

the lessons

we were taught as children.

~ Dawn

A Birthday of Gratitude: Giving Back at Salinas Strawberry Farm

November 7th was my birthday — and like a child still at heart, I was eagerly waiting to celebrate with my family, which I did with joy and laughter. As the evening came to a close around 11 p.m., my thoughts shifted from cake and candles to something deeper — our next morning’s visit to Salinas Strawberry Farm to donate food and clothes to the hardworking farmers who bring fresh produce to our tables.

The plan was to drive early to San Jose, meet my friends, and head together to Salinas. We’ve been volunteering with Hands that Care, a local organization led by Hector — a kind, humble soul whose story itself is an inspiration. Having endured hardship in his childhood, Hector once prayed, “If I survive this, I will return to serve my community.” He kept that promise. Today, despite managing his own cleaning business and facing financial challenges, he continues to give — consistently and quietly. Listening to him speak about his daughters pursuing master’s degrees in medical fields filled me with hope. Stories like his remind us how privileged many of us truly are.

This initiative was organized through Vanitha Charity Organization, where a few of us friends collected food cans, rice, winter clothes, socks, and other essentials — simple items that can mean so much. I missed the trip last year, so this time, I was eager to be there in person.

I reached my friend Priya’s home around 7:15 a.m. in San Jose. Since the farmers wouldn’t be arriving until later, Hector suggested we start around 9:30 a.m. In the meantime, Priya made us a warm, delicious breakfast and tea. There’s something special about people like her — kind, grounded, and genuine. I instantly felt a connection. Thank you, Priya, for your hospitality, and to Vanitha’s President Manju Abraham and Chairperson Geeta George, whose leadership continues to inspire me to stay involved.

The 60-mile drive from San Jose to Salinas was long but filled with laughter and conversation. I got to know Dr. Manju from Minneapolis and Priya’s husband Sree, who drove us and helped carry heavy boxes of food and clothes. His quiet strength and helpful nature made our trip smooth and cheerful.

We met Hector at La Patisserie Bakery — and even though we had already eaten, the aroma of pastries was hard to resist. When Hector arrived, his smile said it all — full of gratitude and warmth. He had also coordinated with another group bringing donations that day.

Following him to the Foothill Estate Strawberry Farm, we began setting up tables, sorting cans of soups, beans, noodles, rice, tomato sauce, and other staples. As the farmers came during their breaks, we handed out supplies. What struck me most was their dignity. No one grabbed or rushed. They took only what they needed, often saying “Gracias” and encouraging us to give to others.

There was such quiet grace in their actions — humility in the face of hardship, patience amid long days under the sun. One woman held a donated winter jacket close to her chest, as if embracing warmth itself. In that moment, I realized: the true worth of that jacket wasn’t when I owned it, but when she did.

The day was hot, and I was grateful to Priya for packing hats for us. But looking around, I thought of the farmers — toiling in that same heat, day after day. It was humbling. As we talked more with Hector, we learned about the farmers’ living conditions — some relying on tents as makeshift homes through the winter. We made notes on what they needed most so that we can bring more useful items next time.

Life has a way of teaching us quietly. That day, I learned more about gratitude, patience, and compassion than any book could teach. On the drive back, my heart was full and heavy all at once.

We stopped for lunch, and by the time we reached back, Priya invited us for evening tea. We ended the day with laughter and reflection — a beautiful contrast to the silence of the fields earlier that morning.

As I write this, I can still see the faces of the farmers — their tired smiles, their eyes filled with both fatigue and resilience. These moments are etched in my heart.

Once in a while, we must pause and look around us — beyond our routines, beyond our comfort zones — to truly see the people who make our lives possible. Many around us are struggling: farmers, cleaners, those affected by layoffs, or anyone trying to make ends meet with quiet dignity.

This planet belongs to all of us, and basic human needs should never be a privilege. The disparity we see is not just economic — it’s a reminder of our shared responsibility.

My deepest gratitude to the Vanitha Charity donors and every volunteer who made this effort possible. Your support brought food, warmth, and smiles to those who deserve it most.

Sometimes, the best way to celebrate a birthday is not with gifts we receive, but with the joy we give. ~ Dawn

~ Dawn

The World I Grew Up In

 

I long for the India of my childhood—

Where faith was only faith, seen through secular eyes,

Where no one asked the last name of a friend in play,

Where Diwali sweets were shared, and from the same hands

came bowls of sevaiyaan in Eid delight—

How free was that India when childhood was mine!

I long for the India of my childhood—

Where patience to listen was still a gift,

Where minds differed but we dined from one plate,

And if words stung, we laughed the hurt away,

How mindful, how gentle, was that India of youth.

I long for the India of my childhood—

Where many tongues wove one conversation of smiles,

Where a gesture alone carried honor and respect,

Where no one feared the other—only reverence reigned,

How tolerant was that India of innocence.

I ache for the India of my childhood—

Where theft was seen through the lens of need,

Where violence gave way to compassion’s hand,

Where Usha and Farzana studied and played as one,

How human, how luminous, was that India of my youth.

Yes, I ache for the India of my childhood.

~ Dawn

We must keep going !

This past Saturday, January 25th, the Museum of the African Diaspora (MoAD) in San Francisco hosted a captivating event in partnership with SFJAZZ, celebrating Black History Month with a unique blend of art and music.

The afternoon began with a guided tour of MoAD's exhibitions. MoAD's current exhibition is a vibrant exploration of Black identity, creativity, and the concept of "liberatory living." The show cleverly intertwines art and design, showcasing how everyday objects and spaces can become powerful expressions of self and community.

Zanele Muholi's striking photographic portrait, "Balindile I, the square, Cape Town 2017," likely served as a compelling anchor for the exhibition. Muholi's work often confronts issues of race, gender, and sexuality, and this piece probably provided a powerful lens through which to view the other works. Malene Djaneba Barnett's "Illusion of Softness" wallpaper added a tactile and visually rich dimension. Barnett's work explores themes of African heritage and ancestral connection, and the wallpaper likely created an immersive environment within the exhibition.

The overall theme of "Liberatory Living: Black Radical Joy" provided a framework for understanding the works on display. It suggests that by creating and inhabiting spaces that reflect their own values and aesthetics, Black individuals can experience a sense of freedom, joy, and empowerment. 

This exhibition seems to be a testament to MoAD's commitment to showcasing diverse voices and perspectives within the African diaspora. By blending art, design, and social commentary, it creates a thought-provoking and inspiring experience with a range of powerful and thought-provoking works exploring the African diaspora. Museum tours always offer a chance for personal reflection and shared perspectives, and this one was likely no different, sparking conversations and deepening understanding.

Following the tour, the focus shifted to music with a performance by the talented Martin Luther McCoy, known for his soulful blend of blues, R&B, and storytelling, McCoy treated the audience to an intimate concert in the museum's gallery. He was joined by bassist Elizabeth, adding depth and groove to his signature sound. This performance was particularly special as it offered a first listen to selections from McCoy's upcoming album "Welcome Back Love," giving attendees a sneak peek into his creative process.

Overall, the event seems to have been a resounding success, offering a rich and engaging experience that combined the visual power of art with the emotive force of music. It provided a fitting tribute to Black History Month, showcasing the creativity and resilience of Black artists and their contributions to our cultural landscape. And meeting curator Kee Jo Lee at the end of the visit was a great way to deepen my understanding of the exhibition. Curators play a crucial role in shaping the narrative of an exhibition, and Lee's insights likely added a valuable layer to our experience.

The personal touch at MoAD extended beyond the art itself. Elizabeth Gessel, the Director of Public Programs, sent a thoughtful email after I registered for the event, which made me feel welcomed and valued. Then, receiving a thank you note from her after attending added a special touch and deepened my connection to the museum. This level of personal attention and care elevated the entire experience, making it feel truly touching and thoughtful.

~Dawn

We are all different. Don’t judge, understand instead!!!

This year, right from its inception, has unfolded with a profound sense of intrigue. My surroundings are bustling with noteworthy events – tech companies initiating layoffs, a palpable reluctance among individuals to return to the office leading to protests, the ongoing Israel-Palestinian conflict, and the heart-wrenching atrocities, particularly the senseless killing of innocent children. These occurrences compel me to reflect on the state of humanity. It seems as though despite the passage of time, our species has not evolved much from the days when small nations engaged in destructive wars, questioning what fundamental changes have truly taken place.

We appear to be creatures losing touch with our dignity and humanity with each passing day. It's disheartening to note that animals, often overlooked, exhibit a kindness that we, as a society, seem to disregard. In the face of these challenges, I strongly feel that this year should be a turning point where we assertively declare 'STOP' to what needs to be halted. We must find the courage to say 'No' when we sense that enough is enough.

As we navigate through life, gaining new perspectives, we realize that our existence revolves around the people in our circle – family, friends, colleagues, and teammates. It's imperative that we express love and support to one another, sharing happiness, peace, and a compassionate ear. My personal journey in people management has reinforced the significance of personalization in business, emphasizing the need for a personal touch within the team.

I recall a valuable lesson from my childhood – my father's advice to hold onto good people rather than wealth, as money is transient, but genuine individuals endure. Embracing this wisdom, I am gratified to witness its fruition in my life.

Love for our neighbors, people, and teams forms the foundation for a harmonious existence. By embodying the qualities of empathy and understanding, we can create positive change. In my role, I find fulfillment in allowing others to lead, as true leadership lies in empowering those around us. It's a gratifying journey of learning and growth.

Let us be the advocates for the voiceless, elevating our concerns to a global understanding. If we, as humans, do not stand up for what is right, then who will? The key to overall well-being lies in spreading happiness, and as we move forward, let's make a sincere promise to be authentic and cultivate love among ourselves.

"Compassion required only one thing...To step outside ourselves long enough to embrace another."

~ Dawn

Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart...!

 

Today I am going to talk about abortion. Yes, without being pregnant you cannot abort right? But I feel without understanding what is abortion? Why is abortion? and How is it done? We cannot understand even why it is there - abortion!

In India pregnancy is usually celebrated and is considered to be a blessing - why not because you got the opportunity to bring a life into this world. And hence, abortion is a taboo. 

" Life is always a rich and steady time when you are waiting for something to happen or to hatch." ~ E. B. White

Anytime you hear about abortion in India, it has to be tagged with health issue or weakness etc. But never one will come and say I did it because I don't want the pregnancy at this time or I am not ready for it or even that it is an accidental or whatever. It's not considered as a good thing - abortion!

Though Abortion has been legal in India for past 50 years under certain circumstances with the introduction of Medical Termination of Pregnancy Act 1971. Abortion can be performed until 24 weeks of pregnancy as per Medical Termination of Pregnancy Act amendment 2021 rules and regulations.

When we look at what is happening in USA, it is true Indian women never had to go through the struggle or march on the road for their rights.

But I feel instead of sharing the real stories that women has gone through, it has become more of a political agenda and even media writes about these in similar manner by going away from the actual topic.

"Let us make pregnancy an occasion when we appreciate our female bodies." ~ Merete Leonhardt -Lupa

I am going to share my story here, I had my abortion at a very young age and it was not a planned pregnancy. As per doctor I have high fertility but then it was something that I had to take during a tough situation. It was not because of my health issues. 

When I was visiting in the beginning, my doctor knew how happy I was but soon I went through a trauma where my mother-in law would measure what I eat and why I eat? In fact as per doctor I got fresh coconut water to drink and when she saw the coconut shell thrown in the garbage she questioned and made a big issue out of it. I tried every way to make it work out even doctor had a one on one to discuss with my mother in-law then but it was of no use. Everything was looked at as waste of money or too much drama for a pregnant woman.

Something I visualized in my mind, if I have to go through this what the child will go through once comes out of my womb? Because I was working those days and everyone liked the money that I bring home but don't like the attention I was getting at that time and then I was thinking about the future..how it will be? I visualized my kid crying and I am coming home from work - that scene in my mind registered in such a way that I was not ready to bring a child at such place. I am fine to lead my battles but I don't want my kids to suffer and that was about it. I made my decision but before that I discussed this with one of the elders in the family because I didn't want this to be unnoticed or something to be swayed under the carpet.

"Life need not be long-lived for it to be meaningful."

When I discussed the scenario with the elders of that family they agreed that things may turn out that way as what I visualized but they stood with me in whatever decision I took. I went to my doctor and requested for abortion. My doctor was not ready in the beginning and she tried her best to convince that things will be fine once the kid is born and I was adamant that's what I don't want because then I won't be able to save the child and will suffer more.

My doctor finally said, I will only do it after looking at your blood (hemoglobin) report and luckily it was good and I got clinically aborted. After that, I was going through depression. I remember I used to often sit and cry looking at the wall. Something, that used to bring anger in me and sadness too. 

Everyone in their family were told that I was not healthy hence this happened and even my mother believed that because I was skinny though I was strong medically fit still society has their judgements - if you are healthy but skinny you're weak, if you are unhealthy but not skinny they think you're in right frame of life. Though my doctor knew the reality and few other members. 

"Do not muffle your cries, for they are the sound of pregnancy loss."

I went back to work and that helped me a lot like a therapy. Today I have two kids thankfully healthy and happy and they both are planned kids. But when I think back, I have no regrets because I reached the doctor on time and yes I often think if it was the other way probably how old that kid must have been now? Or Who that kid would have been? Some things just remain within you.

"I carry your heart with me, I am never without it."

It is very important that we should educate women about abortion, as well as sex education it is so important because knowledge is awareness and everyone can make their decision appropriately. The worldwide report shows from 2000 - 2017, the global maternal mortality ration declined by 38 percent - from 342 deaths to 211 deaths per 100,000 live births. We should bring down this percentage and education will help in doing so. 

Women are powerful and strong so why not educate them about things that relates to them and bring awareness so that they can make better decisions of their life.

Abortion should not be a political agenda, because it's more than that.

"Education is everything - education is your power, education is your way in life for whatever you want to do." ~ Ciara

~ Dawn

Birth place: Earth, Race: Human, Politics: Freedom, Religion: Love

The recent selection of US Senator from California - Kamala Devi Harris for Democratic Vice Presidential nominee for 2020 election, and the Desi,s going gaga about it by calling her to be their native Indian, from their heritage, their village, town, state, and what not!!!!

"Shallow understanding from people of goodwill is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection." ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

This makes me feel so ashamed of as how quickly we change our stand. Racism is head on in people's mind and behavior when it comes to black lives matter and now the same Kamala Devi Harris who is a mix of Indian American and American African - they give more preference to the Indian heritage of her and celebrate it.

I was happy to see a woman was selected as Democratic Vice Presidential nominee for 2020 election but then again it could be another political attempt to gain votes. But still she is the first African-Asian American, and the third female after Geraldine Ferraro and Sarah Palin to be picked as the vice-presidential nominee for a major party.

"You cannot claim you treat everyone equally, if you are duding others by their ethnicity" ~ Charles E Hudson

However, if they get elected in the coming election in Nov 2020 then it will be a relief from the current administration.

We all wish to be at that stage where even though we come from different country, race, religion we should be able to identify ourselves first as human. 

I wish good luck to Joe Biden and Kamala Devi Harris and wish they will spread the message of humanity overall.

"I believe there's only race and that is human race"

~ Dawn

A man who stands for nothing will fall for anything .....!

It's pandemic time and probably I am experiencing this for the first time in my life. Thank goodness for technology otherwise people would go crazy sitting at home.

I am sure lot of you are also staying home and trying to be safe and sane. I like to watch movies and who doesn't ! I have been watching a few but I want to give a review for two movies that deals with racism and it is the hot topic currently around the world along with COVID-19.

"There is no such thing as race. None. There is just a human race - scientifically, anthropologically" ~ Toni Morrison

 Axone - a film which is directed by Nicholas Kharkongor. But  I watched it because I saw one name that is my favorite - Adil Hussain. An amazing actor who has worked in Indian and International cinemas and a National award winner too. The movie is about the North-East Indians who have moved to Delhi for better prospects and their struggles in a new place.
When people move around for job or any other reasons they don't lose their nationality or identity when its within the country or for that sake even out of the country until and unless they change their nationality. But still why differentiate among ourselves because of race, religion, ethnicity, caste or creed?

The movie is about the North-East Indians who have moved to Delhi and one of their friend is getting married. Everyone is busy in planning, decorating and making sure of the menu for the wedding party dinner.
As you know every culture has their speciality whether its about clothing, food, festivals, beliefs, customs and traditions its an amazing mix of fragrance that differ from each one yet brings an amazing aroma to everyone.
Why can't we embrace this and enjoy the flavors?
The movie talks about the hardship one has to go when they are not from that place. New-comers have to work harder to achieve anything.

I loved the movie and Adil Hussain had a very tiny role of being a citizen who is keeping a keen eye on these North-East Indians. Which is also part of our society how they treat people and how they consider others as outsiders is very well depicted through his simple gestures. Believe me there's no dialog yet Adil Hussain has put him impact in this movie. Some of the privileges that some of us have of being an immigrant can be felt by watching this movie where its a struggle for them. I wonder how racist we are? Even though they are from India just because their looks are different a bit they treat them differently. I am sure the North Indians treat the South Indians differently and vice versa. 
Can't we just see each other as a human?

"In a racist society, it is not enough to be non-racist. We must be anti-racist." ~ Angela Davis

To my readers let me tell you first what is Axone? It is called Akhuni in Sino-Tibetian (Sumi) language that is spoken in Nagaland. Akhuni is a signature dish of North-East Indian made out of fermented soybeans. 
My only critic for this movie is that, wish they had shown how Akhuni is cooked, a dramatization of cooking of this dish would have added more flavors to it.

Besides that, my favorite Papon's music and he is singing one of the song - Dance it out. It's amazing, one must watch and understand the pain of migrants.

"Prejudice is a burden that confuses the past, threatens the future, and renders the present inaccessible." ~ Maya Angelou 

Another movie that I saw on Netflix was Penalty directed by Shubham Singh. I was a hockey player once and sports is closed to my heart. If you love sports and / or football then this is for you. This movie has interesting game sequence which literally puts you in action mentally but then the politics is everywhere which one can see here too.

This one is again about a North-East Indian guy Lukram who is from Manipur joins the college in Lucknow only for his passion to play football for India one day. This college seems to be a great platform for such sports lovers.

This character reminded me of my classmate in Pune Fergusson College. I have seen racism then and I used to feel bad about such treatment hence we became good friends and I made sure he is not feeling left out.

"Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced." ~ James Baldwin

Kay-Kay Menon is another my favorite actor who's films I hardly miss and in this film as Vikram Singh character he shows his racist self and how he himself learns a lesson out of it and corrects himself by giving the opportunity to play Lukram who is talented and deserving to be in the college team. Other characters such as Shashank Arora and Manjot Singh are some of the actors who have become my favorite after watching some of their movies. They have done justice to their roles in this movie, one must watch this one.

"It doesn't matter who you are, where you come from. The ability to triumph begins with you - always." ~ Oprah Winfrey 

The struggle to standup against people who are racist or do injustice is really tough though courageous yet when five fingers come together they become one and united.

Everywhere we are fighting racism and I feel we in India also should get rid of such disease and should cure by seeing everyone as equal.

What I liked about these movies is that even if its about entertainment, different culture and traditions its shows the mirror to the society. And we must see that mirror and reflect upon it and bring that change that is much needed.

"Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that." ~ Martin Luther King Jr.

~ Dawn

Not Human! We failed!!!!

What is racism? This is still unknown to many,

Learned about apartheid in elementary school,

But that time also it was taught as others problem,

Those who live a privileged life know nothing about it,

May be that's the reason racism, untouchability,

All this became mere a chapter in the school syllabus,

That is taught from year to year in literature,

How many tried to understand about racism?

No one validated that when they were teaching,

But everyone got full grades in the examination,

We learned to become intelligent but not human,

We always found a reason to discriminate,

Racism, color, caste, religion, you name it,

And if all this is not enough then gender inequality,

To play with people's life is like a game,

Can't believe how we call ourselves intelligent 

We achieved everything in life with education 

But, not Human! We failed!!!!

~ Dawn

#blacklivesmatter , #NoJusticeNoPeace, #StopRacism 

Sun is never the same from dawn to dusk..

At King street we were only a week

Then we shifted to condominium,

Here I didn't have a room for self,

I was sharing with the 9 year old kid,

Time used to pass very well with the kid,

Now after work I used to go day time work

At the restaurant where lady's husband worked,

Big cities, big restaurants had all this show-biz,

But only the employees who work their know, 

The real story of their life with minimum wages,

It was like people had only one dream how to add hours,

Drop by drop the hours will pay more 

But then it comes around there you earn more,

You pay tax more to the government,

But then if you earn less how would you manage expense,

The whole world is grinding under this,

I had a good job in India which I left

I wondered is this why I came all the way here?

I was not happy with this and this is the only job I have,

As per the lady, she kept pestering you shouldn't leave this,

I used to feel bad for such discouragement,

I used to consider them as family,

The lady used to go to work during the day,

Her hubby would leave in the evening to return at 4 am,

To make both ends meet this was the job,

I had decided I won't be at this job for long,

I gave myself four months to find another job,

The daughter used to like me we were friends,

We used to spend time talking discussing and playing,

Lady used to be insulting sometimes with her behavior,

Her parents were visiting and they loved me 

But the lady didn't invite me for her daughter's birthday,

She didn't want to invite me as I had less salary and a small job,

But the mother invited with love and affection,

She mentioned you are part of this family,

You must come for the birthday party,

I respected the mother and so went for the party,

Took a small gift for the little girl,

Lady after seeing me said, I didn't invite you

Because you may not have money to buy gift,

I still remember the expression and moment of that time,

One doesn't have to be in a situation forever,

Things change and one gets an opportunity to change,

The husband and the daughter were nice and polite to me,

Probably in this country I was scared to live alone,

I still decided to stay their and ignored everything else,

When lady had to get groceries she would be nice and polite,

I used to fall for those and help getting bags of rice and potatoes  

We used to go in bus to get these from far and carry the weight alone,

In all this if I get delayed to give rent because I couldn't get the cash,

She would really mess up my day with taunts,

In the beginning things were good but as time started moving,

The lady's behavior was different and disrespectful,

I used to wash the pots nice and shiny 

Since then that became my job,

Sometimes I would forget all this and make Indian crepe dosa,

I used to give hair massage and shoulder massage when they asked,

But then even Sun is never the same from dawn to dusk,

So I believed myself that my time will also turn into good!

~ Dawn

 

Think and reflect upon!

No matter where we land

No matter what we hand 

There is a way of expression

One can look and feel around

A speedy racing time-bound

Like a machine human kind

Went so far that recent times

Covid and it's game surrounds

In no matter of time in sea or land

It kept everyone isolated and

Made them slow-down

Making everyone wonder

And think and reflect upon

No matter where you come from

No matter who you are friends with

No mater who knows you and

What you carry in stock or hand

Rich or poor, Big or small

No matter what you eat or wear

Covid has nothing to care

Not even country you belong

Treats all as one and embraced beyond

Telling to stop and think hard

A moment it gave to reflect upon

Small things that could bring peace

Small place that could keep you safe

A place to shelter and eat and live

But look at the bad luck haunts there

What the homeless do to deserve it?

He has no shelter, no home to stay

But to wander for safety like a caveman!

~ Dawn 

The flower that blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all....!

This post of mine took two days to sink in as I wanted to feel what I felt and didn't want the entire essence of it to be poured in here in my post.
Friday -Feb 7th, 2020 I was invited for a lunch at one of my friend and colleague from work. A little background about this friend.
A very ambitious, young dynamic woman who is fearless when it comes to talk about technology and product enhancements. I have had a couple of tiff with her when I joined the company but one thing you should understand and that is when two people are talking about improving things whether its process, software development or its methodology it can begin with a tiff until you understand each other and I think that is what happened where she accepted my idea and we together worked as a team.
This friend of mine was diagnosed recently with cancer in multiple organs while she was visiting India to visit her Mom who is suffering from cancer. Yes, how common this word has become in our daily life that it also scares the hell out of all of us.
Knowing this friend I always tell her to kick ass as I know she is strong but its always easy for us to tell sitting at this side of the fence.
The first time I went and saw her in her house that was after her first chemo. She was doing good other than her deep breaths in between our talk she was doing good. We had our chats and jokes from work and then holidays came and I went for my vacation trip to India. Before leaving I had wished her and said will see her in new year. I am a believer and I always feel if our will power is strong nothing can stop us from what we want. I always tell this to her too.

"Ones you become fearless, life becomes limitless".

After I came back from my vacation I sent her messages but there was no response. Anyhow, I thought she might be in her chemo or the initial days of chemo because thats when they are more tired and under the impact of that strong medicine which also has side effects even though it might be killing the cancer cells.
Finally that day came when I was invited for a Friday lunch. It was an auspicious day from a Hindu calendar perspective as well I believe because I heard there is a puja (prayer) at her place. I went to her place with some oranges from my garden. We were few ladies from work who were invited. We knocked the door and what I saw was a well decked woman in 9 yard saree, her confidence had no less spark than what she had earlier except her hair everything was oozing with life.
Our friend invited us inside and she started doing things in the kitchen as if everything is normal. She also expected us not be there like a guest but get in the kitchen and help her with making the lamp for the puja with flour mixed with ginger, and ghee. Once it was done she asked us to be in the puja room that she has in the house. A small room enough for four people to sit and perform the puja.
The puja started with chanting Vishnu sahasranamam (chanting 1000 names of lord Vishnu) though none of us remember other than her so we took the help of internet and good the pdf on the phone and started chanting. As she was performing the puja, my mind went back to my childhood days where I had witnessed and been part of these and look today it was all new to me!

Faith, is something which differs from people to people based on where they find their strength in ~ Dawn.

"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase" ~ Martin Luther King

After the puja we all went to the dinning table and started helping setting the table with plates. Everything was cooked from scratch and nothing we did as she had done it all. Like any Indian host she was serving us and we were telling her to sit down and we can help ourselves. She said, I am fully energetic and doctor has asked me to be rough with my leg as the chemo has its own side effects and she was on the roll.
After listening that, I felt she know what she is doing because otherwise she would be more cautious. This is after her 4th chemo and waiting for two more!!!

Each grain of food as I ate was thanking her and her effort to get back. She looked like one of those Tamil woman who just came back from the pilgrimage (Tirupati) where she might have given her entire hair as an offering to God. She was as graceful as she was before having cancer.
After having a long chat with lots of laughter we had the evening tea and left wishing her all the luck for two remaining chemo and looking forward to see her joining back in April, 2020.

The amount of time we spent and the laughter we had, no one wanted to leave neither the friend was ready to say bye!!! Thought we left with the plan to meet her often on Friday's when she is out of her chemo effects. We got out with a little goody bag with the offerings that was given to the God during the prayers and a little gift.

Through out my return to work and then back to home and my weekend was with full of thoughts for her and the look forward for her come back!!!!

I have faith in her!

"Let everything happen to you,
Beauty and Terror,
Just keep going 
No feeling is final" ~ Rainer Maria Rilke

You can make anything happen in your favor if you will is powerful!!! Face everything and rise - thats FEAR!!!!

~ Dawn