It's been quite a while! The urge to write has been lingering, but work has been all-consuming. Whether drafting a brief document or a lengthier six-pager, my mind kept drifting to thoughts of my neglected blog. The inability to find time for writing when the inspiration strikes feels like a formidable punishment.
In these moments, it seems as if time itself is an adversary. There were instances when thoughts of giving up crossed my mind, but the concept of quitting was never something I embraced. I resisted that notion staunchly, determined to keep it absent from my personal dictionary.
Each day brought forth thoughts and topics that urged me to write, yet I confined them to my mind. The frustration was palpable, but I persevered, focusing on tasks with looming deadlines and anticipating reviews that seemed incessant. It felt like an endless cycle.
I couldn't help but think that this was a futile expenditure of time. The desire for clear, straightforward communication, easily understandable and implementable, was overshadowed by the meticulous scrutiny of every word and sentence, requiring constant justification.
There were instances when it seemed like a deliberate setup to ensure my failure and demonstrate an inability to meet deadlines due to the never-ending feedback loop.
I came to the realization that frustration was overpowering me. The workload compelled me to work even on weekends, rendering the notion of work-life balance obsolete.
Engaging with my family and opening up about things at home provided me with a moment of respite. This allowed me to step back and view myself objectively, leading me to consider that the issue might be with me.
Upon revisiting the document, I dedicated time to rework paragraphs, incorporating feedback and attempting to perceive it from a reader's standpoint. Recognizing that impactful words require supporting metrics and numbers, I aimed to let the figures speak the truth rather than constructing a narrative.
This became a valuable learning experience. Initially, negative thoughts surrounded me, and I allowed them to persist for a while. However, immersing myself in the writing process and accepting feedback objectively helped me understand that everyone involved was invested in enhancing the document.
Following this realization, the process became smoother, and the document was prepared for presentation to leadership. Taking a deep breath, I faced the review, which went well with only a few questions—mostly aimed at providing examples to help them connect with the message I was conveying in the document.
To be honest, releasing that heavy burden was a profound experience, and the sense of relief penetrated deep into my mind and heart. I now feel a genuine sense of relaxation. It's akin to understanding sweetness only after tasting bitterness. As the year concluded, I recognized the value of the lessons learned, marking the completion of my second innings at work.
I made it!
I trust that my post will assist you in discovering answers within yourself if you are facing similar challenges in life.
~ Dawn
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