Today I am going to share a story here which I believe is for everyone. People who have kids or who don't have kids still we all live around kids.
Many times we as adult assume we are too smart in front of a kid and hence we ourselves sometimes prove that how dumb we are.
I have a friend who recently approached me to discuss about her teenage daughter and she was confused as what to do? Should I take her to a doctor?
I asked about the reason because I thought the teenager is sick or may be she has some issues where some consultation is needed. I was told by my friend that her teenage kid says she hates herself. When asked why?, she said I hate my body because I am thin and everyone says that I am thin and skinny.
The mother got worried and wanted to know if she should show her to a doctor. The moment I heard this, I really felt angry for those who must be telling this to the daughter. I literally felt like meeting the daughter immediately and help her understand what should be her focus and priority as she is growing up. But then this generation always talks about 'peer-pressure'.
I reflected back on myself when I was a teenager, I was a skinny person and my mother used to tease me saying I will fly away if there is a heavy wind. When I was growing up I did what I liked and that is not bothering anyone and enjoying what I liked. I used to enjoy sports and I was more like a tom-boy and never cared how I looked or how I get tanned in the sun when I am playing. It never bothered me, in fact when adult people used to tell me that I am dusky and I will have difficulty in getting a man - I always proudly replied that its not the only worry in my life. I am fine if I don't get a man but I would like to achieve my dreams that I have priority for. I never had any kind of peer-pressure or depression.
But today's kids they take these things so seriously that even when they visit for a family gathering, other ladies come and comment on how skinny you are or if they see someone is healthier than others then they will comment, ' oh look at you how quickly you are growing up'!
These people who are actually passing such remarks or asking questions themselves have kids who are skinnier and are not yet at the teenage level. Why can't they see their own kids and learn to treat other kids nicely?
I believe whether you are skinnier or you are fat, first thing to understand is how is your health? Are you healthy and have no disease such as diabetic or heart issue etc. As long as you are healthy and are doing all the right things for you, shouldn't even give an ear to such remarks or comments.
Teenage kids very quickly go into depression and this can lead their life into disaster even though they might be the brightest student in their class or school.
As an adult, we all should learn not to discriminate because I feel when people comment on someone being skinny or fat it is basically making a judgement on people. No one decides whether they want to be born skinnier or fat.
So as an adult we all have this responsibility to make sure what and how we talk to kids whether its your neighbors kids or its your own kids. I have heard teenage kids sharing secrets with their friends that their mother says to go on diet because they think the teenager is fat.
I pity such moms and I lose respect for such people. The foundation should be strong and to make it strong please boost your kids confidence by directing them into the right direction as what is most important in life - do you have a good body? do you have all your limbs in condition and are able to walk, run and play around? Be blessed because I know there are many kids who don't have and still they struggle to live a normal life by all means.
I also have a teenage daughter and she is skinny just like how I was but the best part in my case was that I never cared what people thought about me. But it can happen that my kid may not be the same in how she thinks. I always teach my daughter to be open and respectful when she is conversing with anyone. To many she has helped and supported by counseling in school and I always make sure in all this she never gets depressed by listening to someone's comment such as she is skinny.
I met the daughter of my friend and I spoke to her about being skinny and how lucky she is to have a skinny body yet a healthy body where she doesn't have to worry about such things. Instead she should focus on her studies, sports and other things that makes her happy. People only have time to comment negative but in reality no one is perfect.
People whom you might think has a good body must be looking at other people and wondering wish I was tall enough or wish I was short enough to be at a normal height etc.
When we say no one is perfect in behavior, it is the same with looks wise too. I told her its always good to be different than being same like the other.
One advise to people don't say to skinny people that how skinny they are because they know it already - say something new and make sure its a good one.
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